Sally is approaching the end of her life and although this comes as no surprise with a dementia diagnosis, it has hit me as a shock and I feel incredibly sad. I feel deeply saddened for her and how it somehow feels too soon. I feel so upset for dad having to go through something like this, losing someone he cared so much for, who loved him so much. Their relationship was so youthful, they were so cute together and she absolutely adored my dad and that made me so happy. He's been there for her unwaveringly every single day. It hurts to not be able to see her, to see dad, to hug him and be a support to him.
It would be easy to say 'it's so unfair' but life isn't fair, for some people things work out one way, for others they go a completely different way, no rhyme or reason to it. It makes me feel as though life is too short, we're really not on this planet for very long. It makes me feel daunted and defeated as I know this fact should motivate me to leave my unhappy situation and move onto new pastures but right now I feel no confidence and I feel trapped.
I'm allowed to feel sad for as long as I want, there's nothing I need to do right now apart from be there for my family. I just need to shake this feeling of missing out and just calm down.
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