What a beautiful morning. I’m sat shaded by the trees in the park nearly two hours early for work and it’s already very warm and sunny. Perhaps summer is upon us at last.
I woke up with Andy this morning at around 5am, goodness knows why he gets up so early but I can kinda understand it as sometimes it’s nice to relax into the day a bit. It wasn’t my plan to stay an additional night but I’m glad that I did, I had such a lovely weekend.
He met me at the station of Saturday early evening and we ambled to a restaurant and sat outside sharing white wine just talking the entire time. We ate and continued to drink long into the evening and were the last ones to leave, and could have easily have stayed another hour or two. He was affectionate and as we walked to his place he held my hand. His flat was nice, modest but well finished despite his selling of a lot of his furniture. A few arty prints, succulent plants, minimal kitchen, it was a manpad but not at all clinical. ‘I’ve missed being close to you,’ he said as collapsed into his bed. He’s so gentle and loving, softly spoken and constantly wrapped around me. He was so complimentary of my body which will always baffle me coming from someone so beautiful, but it was so lovely to hear. The following day we woke up slowly and explored more of the town and found a nice place for breakfast where we sat and talked even more and I continued to learn more about him.
He likes reading books on philosophy, the mind, relationships (his book shelf supports this.) He describes himself as being introverted and likes time on his own. He doesn’t want to feel a burden to his family so he doesn’t see them all that much. He and his sister are close, she’s 3 years older and him and in a relationship with an older man. His mother died when he was about 14, but wasn’t well for most of his life, she was an alcoholic. I felt so honoured that he had shared all of this with me. It made me feel sad for him as I’m sure his childhood was a little unsettled at times. I wanted to tell him how much of a credit he was to his dad, what a wonderful, thoughtful, hard working man he was. Of course this would have been far too intense of me to say so I didn’t, but I shared that I sympathised as my family situation was hardly a bed of roses.
We returned to his flat again where I had planned to leave for home but ended up staying in his bed talking, snuggling and kissing. I’m not sure what we’ll be, how long he’ll be a part of my life but I really enjoyed the time we spent together. I think he did too. I like how young he makes me feel, how he makes me feel so giddy, how the time we spend together is innocent, perhaps a lil awkward initially but it’s just him and me and we’re almost inseparable for a time and it’s so special. I’m completely unaware of the hours passing and all my fears completely escape me. I forget about everything else.
I hope we’ll meet up again soon, but I’m going to try not to worry about it too much. I know that he said that he wanted to, that we had to, but I know he is very busy with his work. Any free time he gets he crams it with more shifts or he catches up with friends. Nothing about him strikes me as being a causal sort of person but who knows, perhaps his last relationship wasn’t all that long ago...I’m going to look at us the way I said that I would initially and just enjoy every moment that we have together and if it blooms into something special then great, and if it doesn’t, well, I made the most of the opportunities when I had them.
He really does remind me a lot of Stev, in the way he carries himself, his morals, his attractiveness, quietness, lack of confidence. He’s so sweet. I really want to make him feel amazing.
I’m going to draw him something...a big cat, as they’re his favourite!
No comments:
Post a Comment