4.7.18

Trying too hard

My brother and I rejoiced in front of the TV last night after an eventful football match, it was a fun evening. My mind was transported for a while and I felt at peace for a few hours. He cooked me some dinner and we talked, he's so patient and doesn't mind me recounting the same old worries and thoughts. He told me I had nothing to worry about. I know I can trust him to be honest with me, he always has been in the past. I got home, showered and waiting until it was nearly 12am to send Phil a little Happy Birthday message and then went straight to sleep. I woke up this morning to a brief reply, which said thanks and recounted his battle with maggots in front of his door...which, threw me off a little I suppose? But then I suppose if the same thing happened to me I'd probably tell him too. I don't know. I feel a bit empty because I don't yet feel secure. I don't know whats happening...
I'm trying too hard.
I'm thinking too much.
This week sucks.
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22.10.24

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