16.4.14

who knows...

Sigh. I'm having another one of those down days, or, maybe a bit longer than that, lets call it a phase.
I look at things in a negative light. My job is shit, I haven't been able to pay rent without the help of my parentals since moving here, and I gain nothing from it emotionally either. I don't have any real friends, I feel alone. I broke up with my best friend, who I miss dearly, dearly. I just hope that I haven't made a terrible mistake. But if I have, I have. But I have to move on from it and accept it, because there's no real way of undoing it now. Everything happens for a reason I suppose.

I've been keeping myself busy with other things, but when I'm on my own, I feel quiet sad. Maybe hormones are to blame too. It's not really as though something has really happened exactly, I suppose it's just having time to kill but no money to burn and I'm looking up at pictures of different times wishing to be transported back...what have I done.

But then, on the other hand, I am free. Olive may or not be 'the one' but, why can't I just enjoy it while it all unfolds?

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22.10.24

Trying to hold it together, trying hard not to cry. Nothing has happened, it's just I feel very overwhelmed. Tired, deeply tired, to my ...