Shit

So last night I had him.

Dear oh dear. 

I don't know how I feel about it really. I had my eyes on him, knew I wanted him, then had him. I knew his lil flirty tricks, knew exactly what he was doing and let him go along with it. I wanted to go along with it. I joined him in bed, put a film on and started kissing, which was really good but I kinda felt a bit numb to it as well. I just wanted some passionate, senseless action, just wanted to forget about everything and I did. I know full well it's a stupid thing to do, he's my housemate and it could cause all sorts of awkwardness. Not for me, but maybe for him and maybe the others if they knew...probably heard. Sigh. I don't know. There's something about him I could certainly imagine letting myself fall for, he's a talented, driven and sexy individual. Reminded me a little bit of luke actually.

Well he's on tour for the rest of the week now so we'll just have to see what happens there, I'm not holding my breath as I'm not sure it's his style to get hung up on a girl. I am interested to see if he texts though...that'll be a good sign.

Ah dear, I need to cool it and just let it be. 

Yesterday was fun though, driving about London, he got his case fixed, we went for a lovely meal, it does feel like it could be something we could...do. I don't know myself anymore.