An early start for me, I'm in London too early. I wish I had gone ahead and called in sick so I could spend the rest of the day in bed, however I know it would be truly pushing it if I did. Sigh. I'm still in a bit of a daze from last night...I shouldn't be, the cold light of day and bitter cold chill of the morning should have awoken me with a start, I should have bolted out the door, I shouldn't have really been there at all. But, something came over me when I was in his presence, he's captivating. He commands everything he takes on. The way his hoody drapes over his sculpted body, his attention to detail and beautiful long eyelashes, I felt like I was suddenly taken over by this desire. I've not felt that for a very long time I realise. I have really missed him, his scent and the things he does to me. It's just undeniable. There is such a connection. But what can I do now I've discovered that and have nowhere to go with it? We don't the same things from life, and I'm pretty sure that although we have lots of fun, he probably doesn't see me in that way. It doesn't make it right, doesn't mean that it can be excused. But damn, I want to see him again.
No. I have work for ages, I've then got to think about moving and then things will be a lot different then, I can't be doing these things anymore.
I look up and down the busy streets of this upmarket end of London and only want to be in bed, nestled under the sheets. I don't want to be involved with these peoples lives today, even if it is just hellos and smiles. I just want to sit and think, be absorbed and overtaken by my thoughts...I always knew it couldn't be done, segregating the feelings from the lust. It's just not the same in the morning, but I wish I didn't want to want it so.
No comments:
Post a Comment