Worry another day

Today has been lovely, I feel connected with my whole family again. In moments of quiet I feel these feelings creep in on me and the sadness makes me sink, so confused as to what to do. I knew that I could count on my brother to give me some great advise from a better perspective and although I didn't tell him all the details what he said rang true. That I'm looking for change and when someone comes along whose different they appear evenmore attractive as they're something new, ignighting that flame that is flickering out.

The guilt, oh the guilt I feel :( but one thing for sure is that I need to sort out my career first, then that way I've something going for me. I can look for a place of my own, get my stuff together. I'll be in a better place then. And although I know that day will come, I just don't know when. It could be a long, long time. I wish I could talk to him about this, I wish he wasn't so sensitive to negativity of any kind. 

I should call it a night, I'm starting to feel really upset whereas earlier, I felt a little bit  better. I know that my brother would tell me honestly I was doing something stupid and he really did tell me what I needed to hear. It just doesn't make any of this any easier. He deserves to know. I just desperately don't want to upset or hurt him...where on earth do I start...maybe I'll just try and forget all about it and worry about it another day...