24.5.10

Break em gently...

Nothing is consistent. Everything involves changing plans and spending money.And it's starting to wear me down a fair bit.
I'm almost dreading the vast uni-less stretch of summer in many ways,as there are many options I can take which could have a massive impact on what may happen later on in the year-or my life.It's so annoying not knowing which is best though!
I mean,I always tell myself 'it'll all be ok in the end.' but,what if it isn't on these occasions?
I feel so adult all of a sudden-and it's such a sudden impact it's quiet frightening.Looking for a place to live,finding the money to live,finding jobs-ones that pay and are relivent to what I want to do...I don't wish to moan,it's just real drag, because most of the time it gives nothing.
I miss my old friends,and I miss home.I miss that comfortable feeling that everything is secure,if only if it's for a little while-at least you know for a while it'll be fine.
I suppose next week when I visit home again,i'll get given another life-check.Which is probably what I really need,but never want to hear.This is where I step up,really.

Urgh!

No comments:

22.10.24

Trying to hold it together, trying hard not to cry. Nothing has happened, it's just I feel very overwhelmed. Tired, deeply tired, to my ...