Only a dream to me...

And still she holds on.
Correction-clings on.Why do I do it?Why do I still want him?
What we've got planned is NOT a good idea,I can feel it in my bones,but i'm still going along with it becuase i'm letting my head overall my heart.The lust is getting the better of me.I don't need to go over ground,becuase it's going to go one of three ways.
1-We eventually get back together.
= which means that we'll go in circles,go through the same problems that we did first time around.I'll offend all my friends by my somewhat idiotic dessison,and overule any chance of getting with a much suited guy.He'll eventually gring me down and turn me into just a shell of what i used to be.I'll never be inspired,we'll have amazing intermate moments but that'll be the only stability we'd have.
2-The situation will backfire for the both of us.
=people may find out,therefore think lower of both of us.Eventhough it's nobody's buisness!
3-It will increase the possibility we'll fall out and have a big argument.As he now has power over me-I have given him power over me,and I seem not to mind.

WHICH MAKES ME SICK.
...
i really hope this does work out.It isnt a big mistake.
=[