SOMETIMES.I WISH I COULD JUST GET IT RIGHT.
"you'd be my sun,you'd be my light..."
What I wouldn't give to be someones shinning light.To mean so much to someone,I know what I'm looking for,I just can't find him.And i'm terribly sorry for writting that,as it makes me sound so spoiled and ungreatful,I have some amazing friends and have had (very recently) some amazing moments with certain people I have alot of feeling for.But,it doesn't feel the same.I'm not sure if it's love,but the worrying side of me steps in,and is determined to cloud over this possible moment of joyous haze.I guess I just want what I've always wanted.But I know what with all the change going on,change going to happen and the change that has already happened,I know that it's alot to ask of anyone.
And who would want me anyway...
I feel like I need to cry.I feel like I really do need to get away from here.And I need to give him the chance to see whether I've crept under his skin,or if he'll fall for someone new rather quickly after my departure.
What will I do with either?
Will I then be nothing?
What if I find someone-what will he think/do/feel.
NOBODY KNOWS.so,I guess that means I've just got to carry on and hope that it'll all pull together somehow,make some sense and work out okay in the end.Aw,I really really hope so.
Maybe i've already met them.Maybe they're looking forward to meeting me too.
Well.
You've just got to see havn't you.
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